So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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