were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
