Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
