Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
operation have a gay friend backfired
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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