I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
