i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I cut my penus on the lid.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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