I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
