I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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