everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
