College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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