dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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