I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
