hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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