oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
