But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
