I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
