the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
