is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
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