His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
