We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I think i got beer on your cat.
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