he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
