marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
