yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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