Whod you bang
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
