butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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