Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
