dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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