we have officially mastered the walk of shame
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
How external is "for external use only"?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
