Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
