I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
