Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
