left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
