it was like his penis was on wheels.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
