Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize