and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
