So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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