I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
