Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize