Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
