I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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