everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
These tits shall not be calmed
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize