Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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