Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
