pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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