so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Randomize
