i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
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