Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
