I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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