ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Randomize
