He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
