addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
